onsdag, juni 17, 2009

Vinst varje gång (det finns hopp ändå)

Jag utmanar dem på tunnelbanan. Jag stirrar tillbaks på dem som tittar på mig och utmanar dem med blicken. Det märks vilka som är vana att få sin vilja igenom. De blir perplexa när inte jag slår bort min blick först. De håller kvar ett litet tag och sen blinkar de till två gånger och vänder sen bort hela huvudet.

Det är alltid gubbar. Gubbar med portfölj, slips och kulmage. Gubbar med fleecetröja och träskor och målarfärg under naglarna. Gubbar med fruar vid sidan om sig, med självklara axlar och självklara skrev. De sitter bredbent på sina säten och förväntar sig att alla andra ska slå bort sin blick först. I helvete heller. Jag stirrar stint tillbaks på dem som tittar på mig och vägrar att vika mig. Jag tänker att jag slår ett slag för varje kuvad, underbetald, tillrättavisad kvinna i den här världen och stirrar in i deras stålgrå ögon som hängde mitt liv på det.

Jag vinner alltid. De blir alltid förvånade. Som om de aldrig förr har blivit emotsagda, ifrågasatta eller motarbetade. Som om de aldrig ens hade funderat över att någon annan kan ha rätt, eller i alla fall ha rätt att tycka annorlunda. De sitter lika självklart som stenstatyer på sina säten men det räcker med en enda liten blick för att få dem ur balans. Det är mitt vapen. Hell, det är vårt vapen! De kan inte försvara sig mot det de inte känner och vi är obekanta, våra blickar helt nya. Vi som tar för oss, säger ifrån, stirrar stint på deras mätta ögon - det är vår tur nu.

23 kommentarer:

Blogger Lisa sa...

Lite synd om den enda vägen är med taggarna utåt. Riskerar inte det att ta mer energi än det ger?

6/17/2009 7:12 em  
Blogger Grovt Initiativ sa...

jag trodde alla vek blicken på en gång. för att jag själv gör det mestadels kan tänka. oops.

6/17/2009 7:57 em  
Anonymous christina sa...

lisa, ja det är jättesynd men ibland får man inse att spelreglerna är satta av någon annan. dock väljer man sina strider.

grovt initiativ, jag har testat unga tjejer, gamla tjejer, unga killar och gubbar. gubbarna är otvivelaktigt de mest förvånade. dessutom ler jag mest åt tjejer. de kan behöva det.

6/17/2009 10:24 em  
Anonymous Elisabeth sa...

Hejaheja! Du är så inspirerande!

6/17/2009 10:46 em  
Anonymous e sa...

guld!

6/18/2009 12:50 fm  
Blogger Skinhead Barbiedoll sa...

Jag orkar så sällan stirra ner någon som stirrar på mig. Så jobbigt att besvära mig med att titta på dom fula människorna.

6/18/2009 8:40 fm  
Blogger Elin sa...

Heja heja. En sån enkel men viktig sak. Du är skitbra på vardagsfeminism, Christina. En eloge.

6/18/2009 8:16 em  
Anonymous christina sa...

elisabeth och e, tack! ni är guld.

barbiedoll, det kan vara värt det då, prova nån gång.

elin, nu blev jag jätteglad, tack!

6/18/2009 10:54 em  
Blogger Fredrik sa...

Du skriver så bra! Förstår inte hur jag har kunnat vara härifrån under en så lång tid. Men nu har jag bra sommarläsning...
Hoppas du har en skön sommar!
Kram, Fredrik

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